Kiss me with your eyes wide open.

                                                    

                                                   
As we venture out on dating before marriage, there are a few hints and tips that you may want to consider. There can be a lot of stress as you decide what to do on a date.  It seems that the guys tend to have more of a challenge of this than the gals.  The following may help with this process.

a. Each of you makes a list of 10 dates that you would like to go on. If you put your ideas on strips of construction paper you can each fold them up and put them in a decorated container and draw from them on Monday for a date on Friday. Make 3 color strips.  The red strip can be for the activity, the yellow can be for the dessert and the blue can be for a meal. You will have 60 strips of paper in your container.  One week, someone picks a strip from each color and the next week the other one does.  This allows for a variety and takes the stress away from trying to decide on Friday night what you both want to do.  By doing this at the beginning of the week, it allows for plans to be made.  An example of the 3 strips might be a burger at Smash Burger, bumper cars and Dairy Queen for dessert. The rule is that unless you both agree, you must do whatever is on the strip of paper. If you are dating someone for the first time, this may not work but you may try it for a follow-up date.  When you are married, this can be especially fun.  How many times do you get a babysitter and then get in the car and say "well what do you want to do" and visa versa?

b. Be sure to ask someone out with plenty of notice.  Sometimes you may get lucky and the other person will be available at the last minute.

Dating before marriage can be a lot of fun but serious dating can bring a couple closer together.  One of the things you have to be cautious of is staying Chaste.  There is a CD by Curtis Jacobs called "How to be Chaste while being Chased.  This is one of the best CD's I have listened to. It teaches us how to date while staying morally clean.

Some very good advice comes from Successful marriages and families chapter 2 where it states "In all the preparations to get acquainted, build up a relationship, commit to marriage, and especially to get married, do not forget to continue to prepare for marriage."

Dating after marriage is something that tends to fall by the way-side but is extremely important if not more important.  It is vital to keep the flame alive especially when real life gets in the way such as finances, extended family and children.  Take time for your marriage and be sure to put it first and foremost.
If we give our spouse a 10-second kiss each and every day, we will have that connection that can be lost before you know it. The ABC's of successful romantic relationship development are essential to be followed.  They are Meeting, Dating and Choosing an Eternal Companion. It is a process that shouldn't be taken lightly.  Give it your all. As the term states, "Kiss Me With Your Eyes Wide Open, that means to see exactly what you are getting yourself into as you do.  Be aware of what is happening and stay faithful. It is also fun to try and kiss your date or spouse with your eyes open sometimes.  Try it for fun!!!

Jacobs, Curtis (2004, January) "How to be Chaste While Being Chased" retrieved from
https://deseretbook.com/p/how-chaste-while-being-chased-curtis-jacobs-4570

 (Hawkins, A. J., Dollahite, D. C., & Draper, T. (2012). Successful marriages and families: proclamation principles and research perspectives. Provo, UT: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.